Public Enemy #1

I have heard of people's aversion to a vegetable called brussels sprouts. I didn't understand the dislike and, to be honest, I didn't understand the fuss over something as silly as a vegetable. I now consider myself educated. My mom, bless her silly heart, is trying to eat well since she is my only source of nutrition. Foolishly, this included a helping of brussels sprouts the other day from a lovely shop called "Lemonade" near my super max.

In all my four weeks of life, I have never experienced -- and hope to never experience again -- the gas that brussels sprouts can produce. Between 8 am and noon, my belly inflated from 30 cm to 35 cm. It got so bad the wardens took an x-ray of my belly to make sure there wasn't an obstruction. Everything was "normal", except for a whole lotta gas and poop that were just biding their time, waiting to let loose. The doctor tells me this is quite common; her personal kryptonite is broccoli. But what's their solution to this common problem, you ask? Rectal stimulation. You heard me right. I tried to get out the shiv and defend myself, but I wasn't fast enough. (Just for the record, no self respecting science should include rectal stimulation as a go-to procedure...)

I'd rather not talk about the procedure and photos would be unseemly, but suffice to say I am much better now and have left behind three epically dirty diapers. I've asked mom to abstain from brussels sprouts in the future. And no broccoli, just to be safe. Even with all this intestinal excitement, I've gained 60 grams and now weigh in at 4 pounds, 15 ounces.

Today's grandmother-satisfying photo:  

I keep asking Dad to wax his chest, but he never does. By The Way,  for all you Blogspot neophytes out there:  you can click on the photos to get the high-def full size versions. They make great posters...